The Stupidity of Comparing Experiences

Over the summer, one of the craziest things I was asked was whether I liked Korea or Japan better.

How do you answer a question like that? Two countries with a history of bad blood between them, and you want me to say I like one better than the other? I may be crazy, but I'm not that stupid.

Of course, it's a little more complicated than just picking a favorite, as well.  I had two completely different experiences in each country, and both of them were stressful at time but utterly fantastic.


1. Long term versus short term
While I lived in Japan for about five months, my time in Korea was limited to only a month.  And let's face it: half of that time was in quarantine, a quarter of it was for a job, and almost all of it was decided by someone else but me. I felt that while I had seen a lot in Korea and had certainly experienced a lot for such a short amount of time, I still didn't really understand it.  My time in Korea was gone so quickly, I could hardly digest it. It was delicious breakfast I had to eat super fast, or else I'd miss the bus. In Japan, I had a bit more time to sort of adjust to life, a bit more time to breathe and think, "Oh, so this is how things are here? Not so different, after all."

2. Student versus teacher

I went to Japan as a student during a study abroad trip.  Now, no matter what anyone ever tells you, there is no such thing as a stay in a different country where your classes are the hardest thing you have to deal with.  Even in the beginning of my stay, when my Japanese language ability was pitiful, getting over culture shock, making my needs/wants/thoughts known and just getting by on hard days when I was home sick or physically sick were much harder for me to do than get through class.  When life got easier, my classes were easily pushed off to be done in the morning or perhaps after I got home from meeting my friends and going to a concert. Being a student was easy.

Teaching brings along a whole new set of responsibilities: I owed it to my class to be prepared, enthusiastic, and ready to help, even as plans were constantly changing and I was exhausted.  Rather than being an opportunity for me to learn about language and culture (although teachers always inadvertently learn from their students), my stay in Korea was first and foremost, a job.  I had to conduct myself as a professional, not as a kid.  On the bright side, though, I got paid.

3. Independence versus dependence
That being said, it's not as if my stay in Korea afforded me any more independence.  When I was quarantined for two weeks, we were not allowed to go off the grounds of the camp site, unless we hiking (of course, those rules were at time stretched to their limits). During the time we worked at the camp, we worked from 8 in the morning to almost 9 at night.  When we had free time,  the Korean staff decided how we would be using our time.  For example, we were allowed one day where we would have a couple hours off.  Instead of letting us choose how to spend our time, we were rushed through the bamboo garden, taken to a restaurant and billed for the adventure when our paychecks came.  Even in the one week vacation time had very few opportunities to seek out our own entertainment.

 

A bus in Nagoya decorated with kids' drawings

In Japan, I was more independent in certain ways. For instance, I could choose where I was going to go, where I was going to spend my money, and how I would spend my time. However, my allegiance to my host family probably kept me within the bounds of acceptability. For example, if I got sick with a cold, you could bet my host mom would make sure I'd be wearing a face mask on the train.  I would keep my curfew (and there would be hell to pay if I didn't).  I kept myself from doing things simply because I didn't want to make my host family worried.  For instance, I knew my host family wouldn't be mad at me if I got drunk.  However, I didn't want to put myself in any situation that could lead to me getting hurt, being taken advantage of, or embarrassing them.  So I kept the drinking for when I was traveling with friends.

Additionally, when I lived in Japan I had my own room.  I could carve out a space for myself and be alone for a bit, and I didn't have that in Korea, which was kind of hard for me. Sometimes I just need space to think on my own.

4. Food
This is both a matter of my own taste and a reflection of the manner in which I traveled in both countries.  My host family in Japan cooked for me or alternatively, brought me to nice restaurants.  They were pretty obsessed with making sure I was eating right, and introducing me to new foods that I came to love was a source of pride for them. Although much of this was at their own expense, I was paying for them to feed me.  

In Korea, everything was at the expense of the Korean government.  That means almost everything we ate was cheap or cafeteria food.  Many of my students wouldn't eat what was served at the Damyang camp: the fare was both repetitive and, while digestible, not appetizing (the food during quarantine was actually much better).  When we were sightseeing, we traveled to nice restaurants with good food, or alternatively, horrible, greasy buffets.  I had so much disgusting, heavy, fried pork that I thought I wouldn't be able to eat tonkatsu with miso sauce when I got back to Nagoya (don't worry, I managed).

5. Prices
This one is easy.  Things in Korea are much cheaper.  It was awesome.

6. Communication
This one is also pretty easy. I don't speak pretty much any Korean, but do speak enough Japanese to get around and have a conversation with people.  Being able to understand people gave me an added sense of control over my surroundings, although when I was not able to make myself understood in Japanese, it certainly made me feel a little impotent.